Why you should always keep a cell phone around

I am convinced that it is someones job to go around to all the payphones and disable them or smear them with a substance that you would not want near you.

Strangely, on Steinway Street, there is a cell phone store every 74 feet, with every brand you have ever heard of. Sometimes you will even find a Sprint store, four stores from another Sprint store. I am not saying the payphone situation and the cell stores are related....